We were having lunch today at my favorite bagel store. Then a gentleman with a shaved head and a seersucker hat (WTF?) walked in waiting for his friend. I didn’t even have to use my gaydar…only the truly clueless would not know whose team he bats for. But his friend walked in and even a blind man could tell he was family – designer sunglasses pushed up on top of his bleached faux-hawk, designer stone-washed jeans.
They ordered and sat down with the latter crossing her legs like the lady she was. Unfortunately, the snooty vibe was washing over the dining area from her. She was deep in conversation with her friend (hopefully about how shaving his head doesn’t really make him look any younger and the hat just adds that extra level of cheesiness to his look – not to mention the calf-length white boat shorts scream “Really! I’m a lot younger than I look! Please date me, young twinks!”) when her order was placed on the counter and the man shouted her name from the order ticket. It was a few minutes before she snapped out of her conversation, wondered where her food was, and went up to find out. She looked at the order and the next thing out of her mouth was “I ordered chips with this”, said rather loudly and rather rudely. Not a bit of smile or politeness.